Updates all around again

It's midterms time! Let's hear the collective groan :( Ya, my major one is tomorrow, discussing critics like Derrida, Saussure, Marx, Nietzsche, Foucault- how some are similar and different than certain other ones.. It's a big test, that i'm not looking forward to at all. update on the roommate situation. We did have a good couple of days. Offhand, she broke up with her boyfriend, as predicted by more than one of us in the house. She's been giving me the cold shoulder for about two days now. Let me explain.

This past Friday, I was planning on sending her a text saying "we need to talk" but ended up not needing to, because when I got back from class, she was in the dorm's livingroom with our houseemate, Becca. Becca was dismantling the sweeper so it would work properly. We were able to talk about the room situation (the horsepiss smell). She said "I'm sorry" and "I'm trying," and it was let go. She then went on to accuse another housemate, Laina of using a product with bleach in it, which she has claimed for years now that she's allergic to. She said one thing to me, and then after she left for the barn, Becca told me that wasn't exactly what had happened, that Laina hadn't been knowingly using it. Later this past weekend, I'm coming upstairs with a snack. I had to put it down on the sink since my hands were full and I needed to unlock the door. As I went to pick my food back up, I noticed that her bottle of soap that was in question said Bleach Alternative, so Emma's accusations were false. I let Becca and Laina know, and when Emma came back Monday, I let her know as well, suggesting she apologize to Laina for falsely accusing her. She claimed to have already sent her an apology earlier in the weekend, however her story was backed up when I asked Laina later that evening. This weekend, I was able to get the room smelling good, I vacuumed and sprayed the carpet, aired out the room to get the smell out and it worked. However Monday evening, the stench was back when Emma returned with her barn "gear." Needless to say, I was peeved, and was spraying the room with air freshener at every turn. (It's smelly good febreeze called Brazilian Carnaval, smells a lot like kool aid) This possibly pissed her off. What has really pissed her off though, is what I sent her this morning. Below I've pasted the gist of the convo we've had. I was messaging her about possible solutions to remedy the barn smell in the room situation. Obviously, she didn't take it too well.

Allison March 3 at 10:13am

I am posing a possible solution for the barn odor in the room. Maybe, when you get back after a shift after working at the barn, there is a bag that can be sealed/closed or a place in your closet that the clothes can be put, to cut down on the odor getting into the carpets/room in general? It is just a suggestion, so this doesn't become a point of tension. Or maybe taking a change of clothes to the barn so after you get done with your shift there is something to change into that does not have muck from the stalls and horses on it.

As for the shoes and tracking it throughout both the room, upstairs and the rest of the house, there could be a bag or mat set up so that when you first come in the house you just take your shoes off there, so mud/barn clumps are not found everywhere.

The reasoning behind this is that what causes the oder in the horse urine is Ammonia, which can be harmful to people and animals alike. It is also what causes everyone to have a reaction to bleach, which is why they sy to rinse it very well when using a cleaner that has it in it and make sure it is not on contact with skin.

Pretty much this is clutter, odor and health issue. It is also slightly a money issue, because it is not all that cheap to have to go out and buy bottles of febreeze so the carpet/room can smell better only to have it have the barn odor back within a couple of hours. I am writing you about this issue so it can be resolved quickly and with as little conflict/tension as possible. To make sure you received this, I also sent this to your school email as well.

Sincerely,

Allison

Emily March 3 at 11:02am Report

either way I look at this u gonna bitch so do what makes u happy

Allison March 3 at 11:23am

Emma, this is not me bitching. I have come to you on more than one occasion about the barn smell, and all you would say is "i'm sorry" or "i'm trying," and nothing would ever really be done to remedy the situation. This is me trying to start a dialog with you. I sent you a text yesterday saying "hey we need to talk tonight when you get back." I recieved no reply from you, and when we were in the same room together, you gave me the cold shoulder or blared your ipod loud enough that it was impossible to try and start a conversation with you, so I am trying to start one this way. I am not trying to fight with you, I am just trying to find a solution to this issue in a calm way with the least amount of tension. If I come across as bitching at you, I apologize.

Emma March 3 at 11:40am Report

u give me the cold shoulder all the time so its whatever

Allison March 3 at 8:05pm

are you at least willing to try and come to agreement on this issue, or just keep it how it is, where I end up sweeping and spraying the carpet because mud/barn clumps have been tracked throughout the room leaving an odor in the carpet? Because that is definitely not okay with me, because I don't have the money to spend on carpet sprays/solutions to get rid of the smell. I am trying to work with you on this, but it seems like you are shutting down any attempt at a resolution.

Let me get your opinion on this. Do I sound like I am bitching at her on this? Or do I sound somewhat level headed, kinda calm? I know my last response definitely sounds like I'm at my wits end, which I am. I could have gone the catty route, saying I'm not her mother so I shouldn't have to clean up after her, or brought up other issues I have with her, such as the issue of her being really loud in the mornings and waking me up constantly. I feel like I came at this in a rational sense, giving a couple of suggestions to get the dialog between us going so we could come to an agreement and get rid of the growing tension over this issue before we have to get a mediator involved. I fear we might have to get the RA involved now though, since she is seeming to be unwilling to even talk about this issue with me. I just find her total disregard for tracking mud/barn through the house, (not only in just our room- she leaves it in the livingroom and on the stairs and in the bathroom) and for those living in it disrespectful to not only to the rest of us, but to her as well.

I am just hoping this can get resolved peacefully and with minimal yelling, but I have a feeling there might be yelling involved sadly.

Roommate Update

So, the roommate is confusing me a little bit. She's talking yet not talking to me. She's talked to me a handful of times since Tuesday, but not much. Monday appeared to be a fluke though. That has been the only day this week that she has not woken me up. Things apparently are on the rocks yet not with her boyfriend. He pushed when she said no in a playful way, she was thinking since he was going to be out partying with her ex (and his housemate) this weekend that he was going to f*** it all up, yet they were talking like everything was fine earlier. I don't get her sometimes. She's worse than Bold and the Beautiful. Hey, I may be a Y& R and sometimes a Gen Hos fan, but there are some that are too melodramatic for my tastes.

Shopping when it's that time of the month is not the best idea, especially if you are hungry on top of that. you go in to get only a few dollars worth of stuff, and come out with about 20 dollars worth of stuff.It was worth it though. Found out a weird food combo that works- Breyers Chocolate Fudge Brownie ice cream and Herr's Salt & Pepper chips. sounds disgusting, i know, but it works.

Well, I'm gonna go to sleep soon. I'll be going to Sierra's Haven Saturday. I would go tomorrow, but I have class till 3, and since it's only open til 4, it would be kind of odd to go for such a short amount of time. I'm going to see if I can still go in the kitten room though. Oh, speaking of kittens two things. Miracle got adopted, which is good yet bittersweet. He's the perfect cat for anyone to have. Two- they have 6 kittens that have to be around 5 weeks. They could fit in the palm of my hand. Cats do the strangest things. If one cat picks on another, it starts a domino effect of cat fights.

Funny Story

My sister just called with a funny story

She, Phil, Maddie, and their friend Michelle went to bob evans off of 161 the other day. There weren't many people there. They were just seated, and Jenni here's from another table, "Oh, shit." Jen though she recognized the voice, so she looked up, and guess who she saw? ALEX, with his girlfriend Courtney, and her parents. Her seat was facing them, and vice-versa. Courtney apparently asked him why he said that, and pointed out who Jen was. Phil walked in (he had showed up later- had taken separate cars) and said "aw man!" when he saw Alex. Apparently when Courtney and her party went to leave, Alex apparently practically ran out of the restaurant because they had to walk right by them.

I find it hilarious that he was scared/nervous by being in the vicinity of Jenni and Phil. IT would've been funnier if either Mom was with them and Courtney's parents came over to say hi (they know each other from church/girl scouts) or if instead of michelle i had come in holding Maddie! that would've been HILARIOUS to see the look on their face!

I can understand awkward, but not the nervousness from him. Whatever. I've realized in the past and re-realized it recently that it's a good thing that he broke up with me, after one thing I overheard Emma saying to a friend of ours over skype. She was gushing about her new boyfriend, and was telling our friend that "she didn't even have to train him." I'm sorry, but why would you have to "train" your boyfriend, especially so early in the relationship. As far as anyone knows, she just started dating this guy this week, and she's already sleeping over at his dorm. If you have to use the term "train" when regarding a relationship, you can guess it's not going to be a true-love relationship. You shouldn't have to train who you're dating. Hoping this one lasts longer than 6 months, really don't want to hear the phone calls/skyping convos lamenting over him/bitching at him.

On the Emma front, we haven't talked in about two days, since Thursday. She woke me up yet again this morning. I like to sleep in on the weekends. I lie sleep in general, as I've said before. I do not like to be woken up at 9am on a saturday morning, when I had been planning on sleeping atleast another hour. I was not able to get back to sleep afterwards. She has to know something's up between us, seeing as when I was out of the room today, she would crank her ipod/computer, then as soon as I came back in, she'd mute it. She was constantly looking over her shoulder at me while she was in the room. 

We went to dinner at different times tonight, me with Laina, Becca's new roommate (she has her quirks, but we get along really well). She wasn't here when we got back. I walked into the room, and was hit with the wall of horsepiss smell. Laina even said it smelled bad. So I took my body spray and sprayed it in the air throughout the room, even accidentally getting it on myself. Emma came in a little bit later. She then proceeded to cough/clear her throat every few minutes very forcibly (fake). The funny thing being, that she has several body sprays, and the majority of them, smell almost exactly like it! She's an oddity to me right now.

I'm hoping to get to sleep in till at least 10:30 tomorrow. I have to go to Sierra's Haven tomorrow to get a animal fix, aka a de-stressor fix. Oh, I found out that the cat Mikey, the one that looked almost exactly like another cat Bennie (who was adopted over christmas break) was not adopted. I went in the cat room he used to be in, and he got on my shoulders and purred. He's so cute. I wish campus allowed cats in the dorms.

Grr... Apple!

This has been an interesting week to say the least. I always get like this, really peeved the week before and the week during. And pretty much every time, the roommate gets the brunt. Well, this time, it's pretty much gotten to how it was a couple of years ago when we lived in the same dorm before. Right now, we aren't really talking. As I type this, she's half-sitting on her bed, messing with her new phone. You see, she got money from her dad recently, and has somewhat gone on a spending spree- groceries, fast food constantly, clothes and now replacing her phone. But that is not why I'm not talking to her.

Why I am not talking to her is pretty simple. I enjoy my sleep. I may be a slight insomniac, but I enjoy my sleep, and do not appreciate getting woken up before my alarm. I don't think anyone does. Well, for the past week, excluding Monday morning since she didn't sleep at the dorm Sunday night, I've been woken up by my alarm EVERY MORNING. She has done this in the past, and I've talked to her, and she's claimed to "try and be quieter." Ya, it doesn't happen. She exchanges one slamming for another- she'll not slam her dresser drawers, but she'll constantly be opening and closing her zippered bags, and dropping crinkly plastic bags, making a lot of noise in general, and then when she leaves the room and house,she'll either not close the door all the way or she'll slam it really hard.

The past few days, she's been sleeping over at her new boyfriend's dorm. You'd think she wouldn't wake me then, right? WRONG. She'll come in after staying over there, make lots of noise getting her stuff ready for work, and then leaving for work. Yesterday, she called after leaving, claiming to have seen campus security and the Resident Coordinator heading towards our dorm, signaling that there would be a fire alarm drill (which we've been waiting for). Since I had one of the other girls we live with's cell number, I warned her of the possible fire alarm. Jenn (the other housemate) met me in the livingroom, where we waited for it to go off. It never did. We waited 30 minutes before saying "F%$# it" and going to breakfast in our p.j.'s . Emma did apologize, but not for waking me, up, but for the false fire alarm warning. This morning, she came in loud again, at 6:40AM, which woke me up. So I finally get to sleep after that, and the fire alarm went off. It jolted me, so I pulled something in my neck. After we all came back in after the alarm was turned off, I decided the only way I was going to stay up and be able to work on a paper due today would be if I just got ready. She left for work by the time I was coming out of the bathroom after my shower, which when I was in there, I accidentally dropped my cell phone in the trashcan, so I had to chlorox wipe it after. I thought I would get the room to myself for atleast tonight since as far as I know she has plans with her boyfriend, but no such luck thus far. She's now moved to her desk and is doing some sort of paperwork.

Some of you may ask, why not trying to explaining to her again that she's being loud in the morning, and you don't appreciate it? I have, on more than one occasion. She packed her bags fro class and work the night before to cut out the noise she makes, and she still was making a racket keeping me from being able to sleep through it. Also, with me having such a short fuse right now, it would not be in anyone's best interest for me to confront her, atleast not until I can guarantee that I will not start a screaming match. If she wakes me tomorrow morning, when I have no class, thus I can sleep in as late as I want, I may not be able to hold back from unloading on her.

Who knows what will happen. The only thing I can say is the good thing that's happened during all of this is that the school finally got the fire alarm drill done, so now we can get through until the end of the semester drill which will more than likely happen during the last two weeks of the semester.

School is going okay. Hoping to get good grades this semester. I didn't do that bad last semester, but I didn't do that great either, so I'm hoping for an improvement. I'm enjoying being a part of this club at school called Scribes, it's a creative writing club, which is really fun.

Has anyone read the Sookie Stackhouse series by Charlaine Harris series (which the HBO show True Blood is based off of)? It's really good, defijnitely better than some of the other vamp fiction I've read in recent years. I can't wait for Anne Bishop's new book to come out in March. Neither can my sister Jenni.

Speaking of Jenni, my niece is turning ONE on Saint Patty's day, which is a month away! This year has flown by. Liam is pretty close to crawling. He's got the backward crawling down, and he has on occasion crawled forward while Jenni's watching him, but he isn't confident at it yet. Maddie is almost walking. She's jabbering, sometimes talking in full sentences randomly, but mostly jabbering with the occasional "Apple." It's too cute!

Well, I am going to slip into the abyss otherwise known as Facebook. What can I say, it's addicting!

Semis, evil evil auto bots!

So, I went home this weekend. I ended up not doing the majority of what i needed to do (sell some books, go to Target) but got Chipotle, saw Maddie Jenni & Phil, Liam and got my hair trimmed, so it evens out a little bit lol.

The hair stylist, he loved my hair color but I think by the end of the sitting he hated my hair. I don't blame him. It was trying to pull a Princess Diaries (where Amelia's getting a makeover via Paulo, and he's trying to brush her hair, the brush gets stuck and breaks). Towards the end, when he was drying and brushing, he would brush a section, flip it to get underneath, and end up creating a rat's nest in the section he flipped. It hurt when he went to detangle that nest he created. I got about an inch or two trimmed, just the dead ends.

I had an almost misadventure driving home though. I do not hide the fact that I despise semis. I've despised them since I had my temps. It stems when my mom and I were driving back from orientation, she had me get between two semis. However, at that time,t he semi in front decided to slow down, whereas the semi behind sped up. Needless to say, it freaked me out. Anyways, I was back in the Columbus area, had just merged onto I-270 from 23. The black SUV in front of me was able to pass the semi that had been on the side of the freeway as it tried to merge back on. Seeing as I was pretty much on the SUV's tail, you'd think the semi would have seen me (we were on the left side of the semi, not the right side which they're pretty much blind to). Apparently, the semi did not see me, because I had to put the gas pedal to the floor and barely made it past the semi. If I hadn't sped up, I either would have been clipped and then smashed, or sideswiped and causing a major pile-up. Either way, my guardian angel was watching out for me. It just reaffirmed my despising of semis.

When I go home for Spring Break/Maddie's 1st Birthday (eep, she's already almost one!) I'm going to sell the books I had planned on selling, and going to the store to get the things that I need to get. Well, I have class in the late morning/early afternoon, and they might have the fire alarm go off around 7am. At the beginning of each semester, they have a fire drill at 7am. Before, it used to be on either a Tuesday or Thursday morning, but the one for the end of last semester was on a Friday, so who knows when it'll be. All I know is that I won't be sleeping in until that stupid drill happens.

New semester, new classes, same old stress

So this is the fourth week of my last semester at SSU. I have different classes from last semester, but same old stress. I was joking with an old acquaintance today that I have enough stress that would cause someone a heart attack. Being an English Major is draining. And though there is light at the end of the proverbial tunnel, there is another tunnel, that of life and loan repayment.  Leaving one stressful realm for another.

My roommate is starting to get on my nerves again. I can't really explain it. It's these little nuances of hers that just get under my skin. For instance, when she has her headphones on her computer, i can still hear every word and chord from the music that's blaring from it. Plus she'll be on the phone while I'm trying to study or watch tv, resulting in a volume uppage on both our parts. Talking doesn't seem to help, because I asked her to keep it down in the morning since she gets up earlier than me, but she's constantly slamming things and opening & shutting her zippered bags. Like right now, she's watching Top Gun on her computer, and I can hear the intro perfectly. Talking to her makes no difference.

The acquaintance I was talking about earlier, called me outta the blue. I hadn't talked to Joe in about a year. I may have mentioned him before. He was a friend from high school, that I've talked to every once in a while. I stopped talking to him because he sent some inappropriate text messages to me. He's no longer in the Navy, moved back home. I think he might be interested in me (again), but he's so unmotivated. Plus I remember how he was in high school, and I don't really want to get involved with him. He drove me crazy (and not in a good way) at NHS.

Well, I now am off to battle the annoyance of my roommate on her phone (AGAIN) telling someone to go to bed and trying to do homework.

last week of semester

This past week or so have been so stressful. First my senior seminar paper was due, plus a paper for a communications class. Friday, I had an exam due by 5pm, so i was cramming on that. Because of that however, I missed my chance at talking to a professor I have to take by arrangement with them next semester because I read her office hours wrong. Plus, I realized at midnight that night, that I had forgotten the deadline for my journals submission another class.

Possibly because of all the stress, plus it being the evil "time of the month" I am having digestive problems. Last week it was a case of the sniffles/sneeze attack, but now it is this. I'm going to the school clinic tomorrow morning to hopefully remedy the situation. If not, then Thursday when I am back home for break, I will be going to the doctor to get checked out.

Things have kind of come to a head with a girl in the dorm. One of the downstairs girls has been spending time the past few weeks smoking pot at a friend's dorm. Well, it came out that she had started smoking it at our dorm, which pissed me off.Call me selfish, but with it not being in our dorm itself, it didn't necessarily affect me. But with it being in the dorm, not only myself but our whole dorm could possibly get nailed. I say it all came to a head because we let the RA know what was going on. A little later that day, she went down to her room, and asked her roommate if she could get high in the room. Her roommate told her no, so she blew up at her, and stormed out. The RA was notified of the incident, talked to her supervisors, who informed the RA that they could not do anything unless she was caught in the act. So pretty much, we're S.O.L. in dealing with this unless she confronts us or is taped confessing to it.

I am just ready for this semester to be over, for all of these reasons. I'll be happy to hang out at home, hopefully have a winter job, and spend time with the niece and nephew, who are ADORABLE. The one thing I will miss is volunteering at Sierra's Haven, an animal shelter down here in Portsmouth. I'll miss hanging out with the animals. I'll be able to remember them by the numerous puncture marks on my legs and the scratches on my neck and hands/arms (what can I say? the cats treat me like a cat perch!)

Well, I will try to post regularly through December, but I can't make any promises. Check this blog and my fiction blog periodically and you might see some new stuff. Regular blogging will start back up definitely in January when Spring Semester starts back up.

End of the semester slump

*FYI, new post on the fiction blog*

It's the end of the semester. On one hand, I am that much closer to graduating. On the another hand, scheduling/getting everything in for graduation in the spring is a nightmare. I have to turn in paperwork to rearrange my degree audit so it fits correctly, substitute classes for another requirement next semester because they canceled the class that was for that requirement, all while trying to stay on top of my classes for this semester. The reason they canceled the class is because of recent professors over the past year passing and one professor leaving at the end of this semester for a different university, so they are now somewhat short-staffed and having to juggle things around.

Heather has deployed. The co-grandparenting began this week. Liam has done something that I find hilarious though... He has made my dad talk in a funny voice. You have to understand, my dad is former military; there was no funny voices in our house from him unless he was trying (painfully) to impersonate Will smith singing Men in Black (just to embarrass me). So when he or mom posted a flickr video on Liam's facebook page (yes the baby has one, but just so his parents can keep in contact while overseas) of Liam' reactions to Dad and Earl (both out of camera frame) it was hilariously cute.

I have come to the conclusion that SSU is a petri dish of disease. In the past few years, we've had cases of MRSA, flu, mono, etc. This year is no exception. In my dorm alone, we've had the stomach flu in a couple of the girls, and now one of those girls has strep throat that morphed into tonsillitis. I am very susceptible to this, so are several people in the dorm. When I was 2, I had to have my tonsils and adenoids out because I got strep/tonsillitis so many times. This was during the time when they just cut them out, before the laser procedure. So much to my surprise, I was told a few years ago that they had grown back! When I got Mononucleosis my freshman year at SSU, they swelled up so bad that I could not even swallow liquid vicodin (didn't know it came in that form until then--tastes NASTY). My mom took me to the doctor, who gave me the choice of either going to the ER and getting an I.V. of steroids to take down the swelling, or chloraseptic spray. Being the needle phobic that I am (even with a tattoo), I chose the spray.

I am a little worried though since I found out about her having strep/tonsillitis. Since I will be around my niece and nephew this next week, and having been around Maddison this past weekend (which I could've been around patient X while the strep was in incubation period, which they can still be slightly contagious) I am worried about passing on the germs to them. Hopefully me acting like a uuber germaphobe until I go home Wednesday will keep them from getting it.

These past two weeks, I have started volunteering at Sierra's Haven, a local animal shelter, for my community service hours requirement for a class I am taking. I am kicking myself for not starting this sooner. They have me in the cat rooms, socializing with them (petting/playing so they get used to people), brushing them, generally making sure they are okay. I have the claw/puncture marks as proof, lol! My back and shoulders, my right thigh and my hands are covered in them. I have a few favorite cats (Wrigley, Morris, Muppet, Bennie, Persha, Sparkie, Hugo, Cheese Cake, Oswald, Foster), some of which will greet me by jumping onto my back. Bennie is kindof sick right now though :(

Many of the cats in the "kitten" room have at least a cough, some have loose stool... From what I gather, this tends to happen at some shelters when they have an overabundance of animals (over 200 cats). Well, Yesterday when I went in that room, there was some bloody loose stool on the floor, which apparently had been there after taking the cat they had already spotted with this problem out and given it medicine. So they had me and another watching the litter boxes to see if we could catch the sick cat. Well... we caught a cat with a problem, just not that one! This cat, Kaylee, sweetest cat. Slightly grumpy towards other cats, but sweet to humans. She went in the litter box, and we noticed some white things in her "waste." Turns out these things (that started to move!) were worms! She was taken out of the room to be given a de-worming treatment and then brought back in, all of the litter boxes were cleaned out. Cut to Bennie. He had been perched on my shoulders for a while. I thought he had farted, so I took him off, and checked to make sure he hadn't left anything behind. What do I find? You guessed it, a WORM! Creeped me the F&*% out! I picked him up, got someone in charge so they could give him the meds. Shortly after I left that room, washed my hands repeatedly. I made sure to ask them if the worms the cats had were transmittable to humans. Thank God they are not, but I still get wigged out when I feel a slight movement of hair on my hair or neck!

Tomorrow afternoon, I will be going to Jenkins, KY for a mission trip for my community service requirement. We will be helping out a convent put together food boxes. I should be back on campus Saturday evening sometime. I will let you all know how it goes. A little tidbit of info about the convent we're going to be at though. Apparently, when Mother Theresa was in Jenkins KY, she was at this convent!

Well, I will update you sometime next week. Depends on how hectic things get with Thanksgiving. I still can't believe most stores and some people I know already have Christmas stuff up!


Laters!

new post up on my fiction blog. It's a gloomy day here at school. The sky is somewhat dreary, after the rain. Enjoy the new post.

I'm still figuring out how to link up the two blogs, without you guys having to go through my profile page to get to it. If any of you know a shortcut, please let me know. Thanks :)

Happy Birthday to Me!!

Saturday, I turned 23! I know it's not one of the "milestone ages" but it was still a big birthday for me. I stayed here at school for my birthday weekend instead of spending it with family. I hung out with some cool roommates, made cookies, including my fave OATMEAL SCOTCHIES!!. I absolutely love those cookies. This week, it's nose to the grind, what with my senior seminar Major Oral Presentation coming on November 2nd.By that date, I need to not only have the presentation done, but practically the paper in order to have something to put into the presentation. I am nervous as hell with this.

I learned last week that one of the classes I need to take next semester I have to take by arrangement (meaning meet with a professor during their office hours) because they shifted the rotation of that class. It used to be offered only every spring semester, and it's now been shifted to every fall semester. It should be interesting.

My sister's deployment date has been pushed back about 10ish days. That's the military for you. On one hand, I'm glad she doesn't have to leave yet. But on the other hand, I would understand if she just wants to get it over with so she can get back to her son.

Things with the roommate are... going. I got a little bit aggrevate with her this past week. You see, for the majority of this past few weeks, she's been staying at her "surrogate mom's" house, plus she got a new phone. Don't confuse this with being jealous of the new phone, because I'm not. I'm peeved with the fact that she can't seem to adjust the volume on the keyboard of her phone. So whenever she's texting and she has it on loud, it's LOUD. Also, two weeks ago, we had the health and safety inspections at the dorm. She bagged up her trash, but did not take it out. Last week, she was here only through Tuesday afternoon, which when I came back to the dorm room, it REAKED from the trash in those bags. So I texted her to see when she was coming back.. no response. I did this again the next day... I got one response to my multiple texts. So I texted her Thursday asking if it was okay to take her trash out, in case there was stuff in there that she didn't want thrown out, because I noticed dishes and utensils in the bags, along with empty tuna cans/pouches. She also had a ravioli dish sitting on her desk, along with the can that both had remnants in it. They both were molding over! So I took the dish downstairs and soaked it enough to get the molded food out of it, and threw her trash away, dishes and all. It was not my responsibility to dig through her trash to get her dishes out of it. I had even given her an extra day after she gave me permission to throw it out in case she remembered there were dishes in there.

She came back tonight. This is the first time I've seen her in the room since Tuesday morning when she woke me up at 5:30AM  (she was getting ready for work). This brings me to one of my other aggravation. Her job at the school has her getting up at 5:30 in the morning. We've talked several times, with me asking her to please try to be quiet in the morning, since  I don't have to get up at that hour (my earliest class during the week is 9am, so the earliest I need to get up is 7:30ish), along with please shut the room door all the way, even though it is difficult. I get  it's hard to shut the door quietly if it's to be shut all the way since the maintenance request the RA supposedly put in two weeks ago still has yet to be out through (along with the downstairs girls bathroom getting the light bulbs-- they're showering in pitch black since all the bulbs blew out!) I conceded that I don't care if the door is loud, and yet every time I go to get up in the morning the door is open if she's been there that morning.

I have not spoken more than 5minutes worth of conversation with her since she got back. The most we talked was her asking me what I did this weekend, with me responded drinking... and celebrating my BIRTHDAY (even with facebook notifications- multiple mutual friends writing on my wall-, it took me telling her this past weekend was my birthday to get a half-hearted "happy birthday" from her") Since then, there's been a wall of silence from both of us. I really am not that miffed, though I don't really like the creepy looks over her shoulder at me while she was on her computer. But whatever.

I've made some strides in looking into possible post-graduation jobs at animal shelters around my hometown. I figure I'll need to volunteer at them for awhile, so they'll know firsthand of my knowledge of handling animals besides Earl. Then when a job I'm qualified for opens up, I apply and hope for the best. This doesn't mean I won't go for a job at the zoo, or at Chase or any other place, but that's where I really want to be- making a difference with animals. All but one of the dogs from my childhood have been adopted from a shelter. Lexie we got from a family friend. Dudley we got from Knox county ( I believe, they had a booth at the Centerburg fair) and Earl we got from Franklin county. Any dog or cat I get on my own in the future (once I'm out of my parents house that is) will be a shelter animal.

Well, it's about time for me to get off her for the night.I know I ask this question a lot, but does anyone know of any good blogs out there? Many of the ones I read have gone on hiatus, so I'm in search for a good read.

Fast train to Stressville

With last week, there came a realization-- my sister will be deploying in around 20 days. As much as I wish I could be there, I unfortunately have a senior seminar paper presentation the last day any of us will see her before she deploys. Since her husband is already overseas, the guardianship of their little boy will be split between my parents and her in-laws. It's kindof a dual- grandparenting, if you will. 


The next year or so is going to be a stressful one. Not only with that situation, but with the fact that in the next year, I will have graduated from school and be working to move out of my parents house, get a long-term job, etc. here's to hoping that the stress I feel while being in school dissipates substantially once I graduate. I do realize though the stress will be replaced somewhat with other stresses, such as paying student loans and other things.


Last weekend I went home, had a dentist appointment (found a cavity sadly) and stopped at Half-Price Books. This bookstore, the last time I had any contact with Mike, was where he worked. We have dissolved that friendship since then, so I was a little nervous about going in there, in case he was working. I pulled into the parking lot, and didn't see his car, so I was relieved. HOWEVER, I was in the romance fiction section in the front and hear a familiar voice coming from the back of the store (the area where you sell books to the store). I recognized it immediately as his. I mouthed  "F***!" I had a little bit of a mental freak out to tell the truth. It kind of put a damper on the trip to the store, seeing as it would have been awkward if I was to go into the young adult section right next to the sell counter in the back. I have not seen him since before dissolving the friendship sadly. 


Do I miss the friendship? Absolutely. But do I think that we could ever possibly get that friendship back? I'm not so sure. What I mean by this is in high school we had many similarities. As we've grown up, we've branched off from those similarities, to the point where the foundation isn't as strong anymore. I miss having the male sounding board, the shoulder to cry on, the friend I could just hang out and be myself and not feel I need to act a certain way. In the past year, a lot of friendships I've had have "parted ways" if you will. Mainly because it was a friendship out of association. Without those associations, there was cordiality, but no real friendship base. You could say instead of having a large amount of friends that most are not very solid, I have a small core group of friends that are solid and have been friends with for a long time, and will continue to be.


I'm going home again this weekend. My mom is at H's house helping her pack up and keep Liam entertained. She won't be back til sometime Saturday, possibly early morning Sunday with her history of not leaving H's til early evening (6 1/2 hour drive from H's to mom's house). Dad is going down early Friday to help paint two of her rooms back to Army White (one is currently red, the other yellow), so I will be going home to dog sit Earl. Also, I have to go back to the dentist to get the cavity filled.


Well, I need to get some sleep. Tomorrow I have two classes, and in between the classes, I have to write circa 4000 words of my senior seminar paper (had to switch topics, so its from starting line-- eek!) On top of that I also need to write the abstract for the essay. I can't wait til this weekend, when I can sleep more than 6ish hours- lat night I got 4 if I'm lucky, after working on a different project til 2am and not falling asleep til after 3, getting up around 7ish. Is it Friday yet???

Bully not for you

I've been wrestling with this topic for the past week, since the number of teens that have committed suicide over the past 3 or so weeks has risen astronomically. The thing that gets me is they all have something in common- bullying for who they are/sexual orientation. I'm not specifically going to talk about the sexual preference part of this, but the part that I can relate to- Bullying. When I was in 7th grade, I transferred schools at my parents choice. This school was supposed to be better, with lots of students from many different cultures, with an academic challenge. The minute I walked into the school, I was judged by how I looked, my music preferences, what made me. I did make a few friends, but that did not prevent me from becoming depressed with the constant onslaught of bullying, name-calling. I can remember several instances, especially one that happened in 8th grade.

It was in between family-consumer science and english class, and I was walking back to my engnish class. I passed these two guys, one which was at the forefront of the bullying. As I passed him and his friend, he "whispered" loudly,  "Quick hide the cocaine. Here comes crackhead!" Let me say, I have never done any illegal drugs. Any drugs I have taken, I have taken at doctors instruction or as needed. No addictions here! During middle school when this was going on, I went to the guidance counselor. She told me to write down all that they did, and if they kept on with the bullying, to come back to her. This did not help. I ended up not going back to her, because within a couple days, I overheard a teacher of mine talking to another teacher who I had talking about my situation as if it was no big deal. I had never confided in them what was going on, only the guidance counselor.

I honestly don't think schools know how to handle it. I don't think adults of older generations know how to handle it. They were brought up in the mindset of "Just ignore it, they'll leave you alone after a while." That does not really ever happen. It seems to produce one of three results:depression transitioning to suicide, turning into a bully themselves, or the disaster of them all... committing a violent act towards the bullies. In my case, I channeled my depression and anger into being somewhat of a bully back at the bullies. Regrettably, it is something that lasts into adulthood. I struggle with it. Some days are good, some days I'm irritated. Some days I'm depressed, and some days I just turn into a complete bitchy-catty mess. Chocolate helps.

My point of all this is there needs to be a meeting of both the administrators and those that have been bullied, and have the administrators hear what is going on, how the school "handled" it, and the result of their "handling". There also needs to be a meeting of bullies and victims of school violence, where someone has gone into their school after being bullied to their breaking point, and them taking a disastrous, violent action towards their bullies and those that are caught in the crossfire.

I want those that are being bullied to know that there is hope. There is a light at the end of the tunnel. Most if not all of those that make your life miserable won't be going on to the same high school/college/job you are. I'm not going to say it's going to be rainbows and lollipops once you get away from those situations/moving on in life. There are struggles. But it does get better. By ending your life, they are winning. Don't let them win. In no way am I saying go after them the way they go after you. I'm saying share your experience with others, document, keep speaking up. And remember it does get better.

Faucet Nostril

So... I sit here writing this, with a toilet paper plugging up my left nostril. Why, you ask? because that side of my nose has decided it is going to run whenever I move my head. That's right, the evil cold has attacked me. I woke up to find what I thought was just allergies the past few weeks had turned into sinus drainage, glands by ears/jaw hinge sore, and a uuber stuffed up nose. To put the cherry on top, my Bio class started our fetal pig dissection today. The formaldehyde in the pig to preserve it burned the sinuses and throat, causing symptoms to get worse. Hopefully the OTC meds will be in full affect by Wednesday, when we continue. I felt so bad cutting up "Piglet."

My weekend plans may have changed, not only because of this frakking cold, but because my mom, whose birthday is on Friday, might be going out of town to visit my sister H, whose birthday is Thursday. Plus J, my other sister might be going down as well, if her meds have kicked in (gave birth 6ish months ago, unfortunately got post-partum). So besides a couple of friends, the people that would be in town to hang with would be my dad, and the dog, and possibly one of my grandparents-- I'm on her S&%$ list because I've only seen her at family functions and haven't gone to see her. As much as I would like to visit her and Magoo (her pug) I don't wanna deal with the barrage of questions, the woe-is-me stories of how none of us visit her enough, etc. Call me a bad granddaughter, but I have my limits.

If I don't go home, I have to get my community service hours underway for my ROCI class. I was going to start them last weekend, but ended up not. I could make up excuse after excuse, but it came down to nerves and laziness.

Well, I am going to continue for a little bit trying to drink tons of apple juice (1 8 oz of it contains 100% of DV of Vitamin C) and then try to get some sleep after Hawaii Five-O finishes. I can sleep in an extra hour because my 10am class was cancelled in the morning, but I'll probably get up at the usual time to get some work done before a group project meeting.

 Goodnight, and here's to hoping everyone is feeling better than I do :)

AHHH!!!!!

I am going through slight- ok, MAJOR computer withdrawal! You see, the power cord for my laptop decided it was going to crap out completely on me last night. This means, I can't do late-night internet, I only have tv in my dorm room, since they took the dorm computers out last year (each dorm/apartment used to have a communal computer that the whole house could use, but they took them out at the beginning of last year). I'm writing this via the school library, while I wait for group members to show up.

School is getting more chaotic/stressful. The homework is piling on. On top of that, I may have to completely change my topic/thesis statement for my senior seminar paper, which is put me smack at the beginning AGAIN. I have a midterm tomorrow. Luckily, I'm pretty sure that since it's mainly an application and term matching exam, I should be okay.

It needs to be mid to end of Fall already! I'm a redhead pale person, I melt when it is this hot and sunny outside, lol. My Mom's birthday is next Friday, so I will be going home next weekend. This weekend, I will starting my community service for my ROCI4485 (Reflections on Community Involvement) class. I will be volunteering at Sierra's Haven, an animal shelter here in the town I go to school at. It should be cool.

The dating front is still dead, so to speak. As much as I want to date again, I am scared, but I also don't want to get into anything long-distance. It's not fair to either party involved. Unless I meet a guy that goes to school here, it's his last year here, and is from my hometown, then I'll stick to the dating hiatus/moratorium.

Well, I need to get some work done before one of the group members gets here. I'll update again sometime next week. I posted on the side of the blog some of the ones I follow. Most of them have gotten pretty lack in posting. I don't blame them, we all have busy lives, what with school and family. If you know of any other good blogs, leave a comment. It's nice to hear from people.

short update

This past weekend was Maddie's blessing at their church. it wasn't really a baptism or a christening. it was kindof like a confirmation ceremony. She was adorable. the guy that was praying, she kept looking at him, like she was saying "you're a funny-looking old man." it was adorable. H and Liam were able to make it up. He was adorable as well. During the service, it seemed like it was pass the baby game, the babies kept rotating who was holding them.

I'm back at school now. It's as hectic and overwhelming as ever. I have my senior seminar paper introduction due in 90 minutes (not done yet), plus right after that, i have a group project meeting at 5, which i am not even halfway done with my part. the upside is that the rough draft is due tomorrow (not really an upside) so not EVERYTHING has to be in there yet, but i need to have the foundation if not the majority of my part done for that meeting.We got a new house mate downstairs. Haven't met her. Saw her stuff while she was moving in... a LOT of pink. Hoping no drama will ensue because of the addition.

Well, I need to get back to my senior seminar intro paper. Basically, its our topic that we've chose, the thesis statement, reasons why we chose it, definitions. He wants it to be around 2000 words (the final draft of the full paper is to be a minimum of 500 words) but he told a classmate that he'd be okay with 3 1/2 pages. I'm shooting for at least 1000 words. I'm already around 700, so if i surpass 1000, i'll be happy. The closer to 2000, the better. I fully realize though that I probably won't reach 2000, but i'll try my best.

I will try and update sometime this weekend, plus my other blog I want to add a poem I did for a class the other week. There should be a link on my profile or this page. If not, let me know, and I'll remedy that quickly. Laters :)

Possible Surprise

Well, there have been some developments in the past week since I wrote. Since I last posted, I burnt my other middle knuckle while cooking French Toast. So now both middle fingers have been burned. I don't know about you, but I find that kind of funny.

Anyways, when I moved into the dorm, there were 6 others (there was supposed to be 7 others, but one never showed up). So much to all of our surprise, one of the upstairs girls from the other room moved out! So there's now the 3 girls downstairs and 3 upstairs including myself. Not to mention that the girl left in the other upstairs room is possibly moving out after this semester to move into an apartment off campus with her boyfriend/fiancée. The school may still add girls to the house, but that usually happens if there has been an altercation in another dorm and they need to move someone.

This upcoming weekend, Labor Day Weekend, is a 3-day weekend for us here at SSU. I got a call from my sister H, who we don't usually talk, but right now are in a good place (compared to shortly before she gave birth to Liam). Apparently my mom and other sister along with her daughter Maddie are going down to visit this weekend. H asked me if I was coming with them, but unfortunately, I can't because I don't get out of class til 1pm at the latest on Friday. So, they don't know this yet- well, J knows I'm thinking about this- but I'm thinking of renting a car for the weekend and driving down there to visit. I say rent, because my car has a little over 153000 miles on it, and it's a 6 hour drive one way, so theres no way my car would make that drive very well. If I end up not renting a car and going down there, I'm going to try and start my community service for my community involvement class I'm taking this semester.

Well, I  have to get ready for class. I'll hopefully update later in the week on the weekend's plans.

unlucky with keys

I tend to be unlucky with my keys. What I mean by this, is I tend to either be distracted or just plain forget to grab my keys when I'm going somewhere. Be it getting out of my car, leaving the house, leaving the dorm for class. I've only had this happen twice where I've meant to take two bags (one with swimsuit in it, the other being my purse) and forgot the purse. Thank God I didn't get pulled over/my dad didn't notice my purse sitting in the house, otherwise I'd have been SCREWED! Anyways, I seemed to forget every once in a while my keys IN THE IGNITION or, like what has me sitting in the library typing this instead of lounging in my dorm room is me remembering just as the dorm room door latches as I'm running off to class that my keys are in my purse, in the room, rather being in my bookbag with me! My roommate isn't getting back til late today so after my 3:30-4:45 class, I have to call the MyRA hotline for our school to get someone to come unlock my door. Good thing we cleaned the room last night lol!

School is going well. There have been very little roommate squabbles between the floors, other than the trash stupidity this past weekend and being loud late at night when someone has to get up at 5:30AM. There really hasn't been that much gonig on the dorm front. On the job front, I turned in my app at Papa Johns yesterday. Thankfully since I have a friend that works there, it's a very safe bet that I'll be in the running, if not getting the in-restaurant job at Papa Johns. Plus I think the manager was flirting a little bit (dimples were whipped out on his end. He's not my type but I'm a sucker for dimples lol. Who isn't?) I should hear back in the next week or so if I'm getting an interview.

I haven't written any articles for our school paper. I'm planning on an article, though I don't know how widespread I want to go with it. I'm thinking asking professors what their favorite genre/type of books they like to read/ what their favorite author is, and then mapping it out. I may just stick with the English department, because there are a LOT of professors in that department alone. I  may even interview the dean of the arts and humanities college of the school to get his take. Who knows, I still need to run it by the editor.

I have about 45 minutes before i need to walk over to class. I have a question for you all though. I'm looking for a new ipod since my old shuffle that survived the washer and dryer is practically no more (won't hold a charge for a day even if it's used maybe for 1-2 hours at most) and the one my sister gave me (her very old nano) was zapped of battery life when I was given it is no more, I wanted to ask you this. Where is a place/website where you can order a decently priced ipod, New (non-refurbished, because I don't necessarally trust those), more than 8gb? I've looked around a little bit, and think I may have found a 16gb nano at Walmart.com, but I don't know. I want to shoot for under $200, $150 if I'm lucky, but from whatI've seen so far, most are running atleast $175 with shipping and accessories in the storage space I'm looking for.

I'll mostlikely post again in the next few days. I've got a start on my senior seminar paper. Hopefully we find out today if the professor accepted or rejected our thesis/topics that we submitted. you see, we've been having a sub professor lately because the professor that's supposed to be teaching this class has been on sick leave recovering from heart bypass surgery, and he;ll be back Tuesday. I'm wanting to do mine on Canine Bully Breeds, specifically the Pitt Bull, and the misconceptions of the breed. Hopefully he goes for it. I've heard he's a dog person, but then I've also heard he's a cat person.

Well, I better go. The guy from my senior sem class that I have a minor crush on just walked in the library. Oh, I forgot to tell you guys about him. He's around 6 feet tall, dark brown hair, thick eyebrows, brown eyes. He's built, kindof a cross between a farmboy and jock type build. He's nice, easy to talk to, the dog that he has he rescued from a shelter (brownie points for being an animal lover).He's wanting to do his paper on how gym class in school are benifitial, or the positive side of martial arts, showing that they're not bad but can be a positive force in your life instead of violent. Sadly I'm pretty sure he has a girlfriend. A girl can dream though. Well, I'll update you guys later.

Little update all around

Well, here's an update here and there.

The first week of school went good. I ended up going home this past weekend to fill out paperwork to get a private loan for school. So, if all goes well, I'll have school covered. On top of that, a friend of mine works at a pizza place down here. The only way you get hired there once the semester starts is if you know someone already working there. So, I have a pretty good chance at getting a job on the inside of the place (no delivery driver here- i'm not knocking those that do that, just I've heard way too many horror stories about people getting mugged). The dorm I live in, after a week without any A/C  with temps outside being in the 80's, has finally gotten it fixed. I'm soooo thankful, because this redhead tends to melt when it's this hot outside! LOL.

Earl is doing MUCH better.I'm very thankful for that, because even with the parents updating the rest of us via facebook (yes, BOTH my parents have facebook accounts) I was still very worried about him possibly having Wobbler's Syndrome. Wobbler's Syndrome is something that occurs mainly in Doberman's and Great Dane's, its something about the spacing in the neck, causing the disks to pinch the spinal cord or something. I haven't looked it up, for the fact that I don't want to scare the shit outta myself. Luckily, we're pretty sure it was just a pulled neck muscle. One thing is for sure though, he's a peanut butter addict!

Well, I better get back to homework. I've got a semi early morning tomorrow, so I'm prolly going to call it a night slightly early tonight. The good thing about having to get up early most of this summer? It's helped me adjust to early classes a whole lot better.

slightly panicking

I'm back at school now. This past weekend was very stressful. Earl was having a medical issue, and parents were out of town for my brother in-law's deployment, so I was freaking out. Now, I'm stressed over paying for school. You see, my school has given me enough to cover half each semester (not including books). So now I have to find a private education loan to cover the rest of the amount. Otherwise I'll be making 4 payments to the school around $700 each! Ya, now you can see why I'm panicking a little bit. I don't know if any of you noticed, but I posted a list of some of the blogs I read (some dormant, some not).

I admit, I am a romance novel fan, especially those that are lean on the side of paranormal- involving "shifters", witches (but mainly just shifters. Some of my favorites are Nora Roberts, Cynthia Eden, and especially Anne Bishop and Shelly Laurenston. So I want to pose this question(s) to you. What is your favorite genre, and/or who is your favorite author?

I'll post more after this weekend. I'm going to try and find a job down here as quickly as possible, plus keep up if not get slightly ahead of my studies. I have a full courseload this semester, so I gotta hit the books hard and often, lol.

I do have to add though, the view from my dormroom windows... YUM!! Perfect view of the soccer field, which had a wonderfully delicious view of some very hot guys playing soccer. I'm going to have to get a stool so I can sit and watch them play :)

My summer... and other things

I realized (due mainly to a loyal reader :) ) that i've mainly been lementing on this blog in many (most) of my last few posts. So here's a full update on things that have been happening with me and family.

With the friend situation, he never replied to my explination. Was I a little disappointed he didn't put up a bigger fight to try and salvage the friendship? yes and no. Because at the same time, I want to believe he realized what I was saying was the truth.

My summer has been pretty much nonstop work. if I'm not working at the babysitting job, I'm usually at my Gymboree job, and vice versa. There have been few days (even weekends) that I have not been worknig at one or the other.

If I haven't been working, or after I'm done working that day, sometimes I'm hanging out with family. J and I are kind of in a "love ya, but you're starting to rub a nerve," mainly due to our lack of sleep (I'm averaging on weeknights around 4 hours max.. I know, a problem). What can I say? she has a fussy baby, I have insomnia lol. Maddie is almost 5 months old already! She's so adorable. She's starting to teeth, with 3 teeth starting to poke through her gums. THe other day, she had to have her hips ultrasounded. This was because her hips since her first doctor's visit, they were worried about her hip growth. If they didn't grow the way they liked, it was going to be a cast or brace. They were starting to get worried again on this last checkup because during the exam, her hip made a popping noise! So they did an ultrasound, and everything was fine! No need for cast or brace, which is an answer to everyone's prayers, and she can continue to try and walk up people's chests while they hold her, hehe.

H and I have made up. I don't know if I blogged about it when it happened, but it was shortly before she gave birth to Liam. up until about a week ago, it was thought that she was going to be deploying this upcoming weekend and her husband the following, because her two CO's hadn't agreed on a decision. WE finally found out she's not delpoying til November, giving her a little bit more time to bond with Liam. Her husband will still deploy the weekend of the 15th.

Speaking of the weekend of the 15th, that's when I go back to school. By then, I SHOULD have my financial aid completed. You see, this year, my last year of school, they've decided to verify my information. Pretty much, an audit. So I have to go through all these hoops before I can get aid. Even with aid, I know I'm going to have to get a job down there to help pay for school, I'm already certain of it. As much as I don't want to, it looks like I will be joining the fast food workers nation in a few weeks. Not to insult them, it's just I've been in retail this whole time, and tried to avoid it because I've heard it can be very chaotic and confusing. P-town doesn't exactly have that many retail stores, and most of them should have their available positions filled by the time we college students return for the fall.

The whole dating thing has stalled. I want to stick to what I said (nto dating til after college), but I also want to be out there, you know? Get the dating jitters out of the way, move past the shameless flirting.  The attraction to Andrew and Kev have kindof fizzled as well. I'm attributing that to not seeing them though. It's just as well I guess.

I have goals for school this year. Graduate being the endgame lol. I want to have fun, not be stressed out. I want to stick to my goals, my schedule, etc.

Well, I should get ready for bed. I may not be babysitting til Thursday again this week, but I am at Gymboree tomorrow. I'll probably not blog again til I get down to school, so untill then...


Oh, one last thing.. Anyone know of any good blogs fiction/nonfiction to read? The majority of the ones I read have had problems pop up, causing them to put their blogs on hold, some indefinitely, which sucks, but is understandable.

losing friends

So, this blog.. not the happiest as ones that have focused on my neice and nephew (they are so ADORABLE!)

You see, I'm in the process of disolving a friendship. I say "in the process" because ths guy thinks the issues stems from only this past weekend's  "brush off". When it really is from not only a summer of brush offs, but realizing the friendship has faded over the past couple years. (Blame the english major in me for the metaphor) It's like we used to be in the same book but different chapters. Now.. it's like we're in different books from the same author. We have similarities/shared interests, but not enough to keep the friendship intact. It sucks, because I considered him my best guy friend. It's not like I wanna lose a best friend, I find myself internally going back and forth questioning this, but I'm sick of the letdowns. I mean, only once I said "goodbye" to the friendship in a message to him, did he actually put plans out there for us to hang out. The last time we talked was when we ran into each other after I had a job interview, and then it seemed awkward, almost forced somehow.

Work is going well, at both jobs. Both ive momentary troubles, but that happens with any job. School starts up in a couple weeks for me. Should be an interesting last year in college. Then on to bigger and better things.

Sorry for such a brief post. Once all this mess is over with (whether the friendship is dissolved or somehow is kept going) I'll let you guys know. My question for everybody is, have any of you been in a similar situation?

Another week, lack of sleep

I am a tired lady right now. Who knew that sleeping in a lot or even just a little when you have the weekend off makes the rest of the week an insomniac mess? besides last night, i got AT MOST 4 hours of sleep a night. I'm so looking forward to tomorrow night after I get done babysitting. I don't have to work at the store until at least Sunday (I'll find out later today after my 12-3 that might have me stay til 5 shift). So I will get to sleep slightly earlier, plus be able to sleep slightly longer at least Saturday night. Probably not Friday night because J and Ph are coming over to clear out a room that will be Liam's coming this August when both his parents deploy.

I ended up going to K's 4th of July bonfire sunday, which was long. I mean, it had it's moments, like Andrew, the cute friend of K's that she plays magic the gathering with (yes, she's a dork. No, i don't play, so I'm not as big of a dork, lol) Anyways, there was some flirting going on between the two of us.. that was thwarted by his/their friend Goose. This guy's take on friendship is that you're friends with him if he insults/makes fun of you. He's extremely abrasive, and will not let himself be wrong. For example, K, Amanda (mutual friend) and I had come in from petting her neighbor's rottweiler-mastiff mix puppy (7 weeks old, SOOO ADORABLE). Goose made the flippant comment "well, that's a stable dog." I made the comment back that it depends more on the handling of the dog, not the breed itself. He pretty much told me I was wrong, and then sited that German Shepard dogs were psychotic. I went off on him, again siting the handlnig was important, and started to site exampes since I knew of several dogs from that breed, plus a pittbull that were not "psychotic" and went agains breed stereotypes. However, L (K's boyfriend) cut me off. K was defending me and also going off on Goose for a statement he made to her stepdad earlier in the night. L's way of defusing the situation was to "suggest" that I didn't need to be in the room, that I could leave the room. This is also the same guy that after he ran into my ex at a Gamestop, invited him to K's grad party even though my ex had claimed he hated K. Yes, their friends, but still, kinda rude. The reason he didn't suggest Goose leave was because they were about to start a game that's similar to Risk/magic.

I was ready to deck Goose. Andrew slightly took everybody's minds off the argument with a "size of his anatomy" joke. I went outside by the waning fire to calm down. I had intended to spend the night even though I wasn't drinking, but decided to call it a night and leave, because I knew if I stayed til the game was over (it was a little after 3 when I left and they were just getting ready to start!) I would end up decking Goose.

Babysitting this week has been okay. The oldest kid is starting to have more attitude than the 5 year old, but is quickly defused.

I know I should touch on the Kevin subject. I kinda put a feeler out there, suggesting that he come hang out at K's bonfire (she had already invited him). He declined, because he was having his own party. No inviting me to his, or whatever. I'm going to back off the attempting to see where things go for a while, mainly because I'm only in town for another month and I'm not doing anything long-distance again. Maybe when I'm in town for long periods of time I might see where things are, but right now dating's on the back burner.

Well, I have to go get ready for my shift at Gymboree. I'll try and write more often, promise :)

matchmaking relatives, UGH!

So...J and her husband have gotten it in their head that I should get togetther with H's brother in-law Kevin. He's a year younger than me. I've known him most of my life- when we were younger, we were on a local summer swim team together. Ya, we get along easily. J doesn't know that towards the end of high school, I was contmplating getting together with him, but that didn't pan out. Now, They've planted the damn seed in my head again! Especially with when I was holding H's son Liam yesterday and Kev came over and barely touched both my arms while paying attention to Liam...

If it was a year from now, I would've  possibly cosidered it. But not now. I have a year left in school, so I'll not be in twon for most of the months from August-May. I'm not going through the long-distance stuff again.

Work at both the kids retail store and the babysitting gig is going well. I lack sleep most days, especially with my slight case of insomnia, so caffiene is my friend, lol.

Let me pose the question to you guys. Should I attempt to see if Kev is interested, or just let it go for now?

Almost Gone

Well, work is going good. The kids clothing store jb is sometimes confusing, but I'm getting the hang of it. This week was interesting there and at the babysitting job. You see, my allergies flared up, which morphed into a bad cold. I lost my voice practically completely. Ya. I think I got it for one or both of the twins. This week at the babysitting job, I only had 3 of the four kids (oldest was at camp, will be back next week). I expected to have lots of tantrums from the 5 year old, but he's been really good this week, minimal tantrums, which were all qwelled quickly. Earl is still being his crazy self. He was not fun to deal with a few nights ago when it was storming and I wasn't feeling well. Needless to say, he goes in his cage at night if there's the possibilty of storms in the area and everyones asleep/you're the only one home.

This is a short update, but I'll edit later and add to it. The munchkins are getting into stuff, plus one is looking especially sleepy. One last thing though. Sometime in the next cuple weeks, my sister H and her family are coming up while they're on block leave. So I'll get to meet her newborn son. My neice from my other sister turned 3 months yesterday, and H's baby boy turned 2 weeks old :)

I'll have more later.

Look ma, one of each! :)

H finally had Liam at 12:16 AM June 3. She was induced at 1pm on June 1st, so you can imagine how much "fun" she was having for 36ish hours. He's adorable, already holding up to his middle name (as much as he can in his newborn state lol).

The night I found out or the night after I found out about my job at the childrens retail store, my mom referred me to her coworker that needed a babysitter. So, now I have two jobs. I babysit M-Th, that is when I'm not working at the store. There's four kids. The two youngest are 13 month old twins (boy and girl), a 4/5 year old boy, and a 9 year old girl. The twins are fun, they keep me busy. The 5 year old likes to test, which his mom said he would. He's coming around slowly. We'll see how it goes. The 9 year old is my little helper. You see, the twins, they both like to NOT stay still when getting their diapers changed, which makes things especially difficult. She helps entertain them while I change them if they aren't happy with the toy that's in teir hands.

I started at the store today. It didn't go that bad. The first 3 hours I wa in the stock room doing paper work and reading the employee handbook. The last hour, I was out on the floor, training at cashwrap. We had one incident during training. These three guys came into the store. I immediately thought something was off. Both me and the manager kept talking to them frequently. Turns out they were pulling an LP (Loss Prevention), aka, they were shoplifting. Since I didn't know the code, she had to go in the back and call security without them getting suspicious. One of the three had left before the guard could get there. I don't know if they caught them or not. Hopefully they did.

Well, I should probably get off here soon. I have to be out the door by 7:30 at the latest to be at my babysitting job by 8:30. You gotta love early morning traffic :) I'm sooo stopping at BP for coffe on my way there.

Night all :)